Russian Roulette

The Secret Perils of Police Postings

Russian Roulette: Police Posting Procedures

Are you playing Russian roulette with your health and fitness?

If you’re not then possibly you should be‼️ Lemme me explain why.

Picture the scene.

It’s 5:45am tired and groggy you’re about to enter a room and participate in a deadly game of Russian Roulette. 

Your entire future (for that day) depends on the next 20 mins.

You take your seat and nervously await your fate…

The Russian roulette I’m speaking of was referred to by supervising officers as Police Postings.

This was where the runners and riders were issued for the shift. 

Contrary, perhaps, to public opinion all officers are not the same and there were certainly some people that we worked with that we would never associate with unless a gun was forced to our head 😫🔫

And metaphorically this is what we faced every day at the beginning of our shifts. 

Just to create a little more drama the postings were called out in numbers. First number called was the type of vehicle eg Pursuit car, 4 x 4 or motorcycle. The second number indicated the driver whilst the third let you know who the operator (passenger) was going to be.

Sat in a horseshoe shape in a small room we listened eagerly for our numbers to be called whilst desperately hoping that we didn’t get shafted with the village idiot, Cop Idol or IKEA (I know everything already) 

The supervising officer spun the chamber of the gun and then mercilessly pulled the trigger… 

One by one.

The number of survivors in the room dwindled with each shot.

And by a process of elimination you could work out your fate and who you’d be shut in a car with for the rest of the day. 

Now this could go either way.

It could be the best shift of your life and pass quickly and safely seasoned with the right amount of upholding the law, adulation from tourists, catching the bad guys and then finishing on time. 

Or it could be the shift that made you regret ever setting foot inside the gates of Hendon.

So back to your health and fitness. 

In the analogy above with one bullet in the chamber of a standard 6 shot revolver there is clearly a 1 in 6 chance of not being in a fit state to pull the trigger for a second time.

By a process of elimination you can work out your chances.

Or in the posting example above you can see who you are going to get lumbered with by a process of elimination.

So here’s my point. 

If you’re exercising furiously either doing Crossfit five days a week, Running every second day or perhaps you’ve found another ingenious method of pummelling your body into weight loss submission with relentless consistency. 

And Goddammit you’re still not budging that bulge.

Guess what?

More exercise isn’t the answer.

At the other end of the calorie expenditure scale (pun intended) is calorie consumption. Ie what you’re putting in your mouth. 

You cannot out gallop 🏇🏻 a diet that is not congruent with your goals.

To try is the equivalent of pulling the trigger 6 times without spinning the chamber. 

Your health and fitness may not be the life or death ordeal outlined above but if you’d like some help stacking the odds in your favour then please comment below and quote “Deer Hunter” for special offer. 

About the Author Stephen Devine

Steve not just a skilled Crossfit Coach, but a top-tier CrossFit Competitor who's ranked in the top 1% worldwide in the 2023 Crossfit Open! And this is despite spending six weeks on crutches following surgery to fix a broken ankle just a year ago. He's Qualified as a Crossfit L1 Coach, Crossfit Gymnastics, and is also a qualified Olympic Weightlifting Coach.

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